Ectopolis Police Department courtesy call

I've been living in a high-rise in a large ghost city for the last four-hundred years or so, if you can really call them "years"....if you can really call it "living"..... It's the 23rd Century on Earth right now, I think.....it was 1892 when I was body-snatched off of a square-rigger carrying guano from South America to Europe....I imagine that my ship-mates marked me down as "lost overboard".....but what really happened is that I was on the dog-watch when a ghost ship flying the Jolly Rodger came sweeping out of the fog, and I found myself suddenly flying away from my ship, in the arms of a ghost-pirate....with an eye-patch, a touch which I thought was just silly....

Well, they told me I could join up with them, or be tossed to eternity....so I said I would join up....I won't describe the initiation ceremony, it was disgusting....after many various adventures, the ghost ship returned laden with treasure and body-snatched crew members from sundry worlds to the great port of Ectopolis, on the Real Dead Sea ghost coast.....With my share of the loot I bought a little cottage on the edge of town, and as the years went by and the population increased I was able to sell the place for a good profit, and move into my current residence, in a nice part of the city, overlooking a fashionable graveyard....

Every once in a while some other human will show up here, and since I'm now senior human in the area, after the old chinaman left, I got a courtesy call from the guys downtown when a human girl named Maria was found wandering around the waterfront one morning....I cranked over the old Rolls-Royce Silver Ghost and cruised on down to the station....

When I got down there and was introduced to this Maria, she had quite a few questions.....